As we enter into this next chapter in the life of Poop or Chocolate I’m reminded of my wide-eyed days in the Girl Scouts, and in particular, a song we used to sing to welcome in new friends while reminding the old ones just how special they remain. It went a little some thing like this . . . *Ahem . . . Cue my mu’fuckin’ music.
(WARNING: High levels of creepiness may cause technical difficulties.)
Impossibly, the sound you just heard was our servers shattering. Just as I suspected, that song is too creepy for the new site. Whatever. I wasn’t feelin’ those old biddies anyway. I need new-friend making Girl Scout music with swerve. That goes ham. That shouts, “What’s good, shawty?! Big Bloggy wants to MAKE NEW FRIENDS!” SISTAHS IN SCOUTIN’ – TELL THEM HOW WE DO!
I’ve watched this a few times now. It’s not unreasonable to say I’ve studied it (not that kind of “studied it,” perv-brain). One question: Which one is Bobbing Monkey? Please tell me. Which one is Kaitlin the Bobbing Monkey? I just wanna know. It’s not a big deal, I just wanna . . . Y’know what? Don’t tell me. It’s not important. It’s not like it’s eating me up inside or anything. I’m fine. Why won’t you drop this?
Another thing: Girls, don’t think you slipped one past me when you gave little man smaller font in the credits. Dude was mixing it up for you and you try and bury him? Well it didn’t work. I see you, Lil’ G! AKA Ace 101! AKA . . . Trevor. Me, Lil’ G, Ace 101. We should make new friends together (last warning, pervert). Trevor’s not invited. Tell me you wouldn’t watch an Ace 101 joint starring Lil’ G and Big Bloggy. I defy you to not watch that! BOBBING MONKEY, REVEAL THYSELF!!!
If you keep pestering me about Bobbing Monkey I’m gonna forget my original point. Which is, if you’re new to Poop or Chocolate allow me to offer my hand in a gesture of new friendship. My name is Ben and mi casa es su casa. Bienvenidos! And if you came over with us from the old site and already know how I feel about casas, get over here and let me wrap a big bear hug aroundya. I hope you feel even more at home here than at the last spot.
There’s a saying in the world of business, “If you’re not expanding you’re contracting.” And if I’m ever contracting you can best believe it’s because Big Bloggy’s about to give birth as the world’s first pregnant man; which is just a really disgusting way of saying I have impossible goals that I intend on making possible and this move is just an early mile marker in the marathon of epic expansion.
Take a tour of the new digs and, if you haven’t already, check out the interview with Donald Glover right below this post. I hope you like what you see and read. This is just the beginning, y’all. Silver and Gold – One Love.
I'm not sure if Gold is being celebrated or murdered. This picture is too vague. And we all know Silvers and Golds have a complicated emotional history.
My name is Ben and I blogged this for the silvers and the golds.
